Annoying Facebook Status
· I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect!
· No one ever seems to realize that when someone says, “The last thing I want to do is hurt you,” basically implies that there is a list and hurting you is on it.
· If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.
· Legally changing my name to Hugh Jass
· I’m in my happy place . . . PLEASE DON’T RUIN IT!
· Screw Snapple I’m the best stuff on earth
· Why does mineral water that has “trickled through mountains for centuries” have a “Use By” date?
· I wonder if butterflies get humans in their stomach when they’re anxious?
· It’s awkward as an ad**t to get unsolicited help from a crossing guard.
· Nobody says ślong story shortť unless it’s already too late
· No one ever seems to realize that when someone says, “The last thing I want to do is hurt you,” basically implies that there is a list and hurting you is on it.
· If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.
· Legally changing my name to Hugh Jass
· I’m in my happy place . . . PLEASE DON’T RUIN IT!
· Screw Snapple I’m the best stuff on earth
· Why does mineral water that has “trickled through mountains for centuries” have a “Use By” date?
· I wonder if butterflies get humans in their stomach when they’re anxious?
· It’s awkward as an ad**t to get unsolicited help from a crossing guard.
· Nobody says ślong story shortť unless it’s already too late
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